iPod beater, you think?*
Conversations real vs imagined
(from collegehumour):Imagined
HOT MUSCULAR ISRAELI LOCKSMITH INSTALLING MY DEADBOLT: So you live here alone?
ME: No.
HMILIMD: You live with roommate?
ME: No, boyfriend.
HMILIMD: Oh, that’s too bad. You are hot.
ME: Oh, thank you. ( I cast my eyes down as if he’s embarrassing me)
HMILIMD: I want to stop screwing in this bolt and screw you right here on your sofa.
ME: I’m sorry I’m can’t. I’m spoken for.
HMILIMD: But I must have you NOW.
ME: No, you have to control yourself! Please, put your shirt back on!
HMILIMD: I beg you, if you won’t let me screw you on your sofa right now, then at least let me install this lock for you without wearing a shirt.
ME: Okay, I guess that’s fair.
Actual
HMILIMD: So you live here alone?
ME: No.
HMILIMD: You live with roommate?
ME: No, boyfriend.
HMILIMD: Me too.
*
They don't make grandmothers like that in Malaysia.
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